I was working under the house in a very tight place. I mean it was so close in there the every time I took a deep breath; my ribs rubbed the foundation wall. I was trying to put some work lights in place so I could see to get some work done. Our old pipes, which were more like water hoses on steroids, needed to be replaced. I got the last work light in place and started to position myself so I could crawl back out of there. I was in an almost sitting position. My feet were on a pile of boards and my rear end was just about on top of a pile of old pipes that had been removed from our well. My plan was to get my feet on acrossed that pile of boards, lay down, roll over, then crawl on my belly to the end of those boards, hang a sharp left and wiggle on out. It was a good plan except for one little hitch.
When I started to turn so I could get one leg over the boards, my boot slipped and wedged the heel of my boot between that pile of boards and that pile of pipe. My first instinct was to give a quick jerk to free my heel. But that caused my right boot to slip and now both my heels were caught. Now my rear end was on my boots and my head and shoulders was against the floor joists. TRAPPED! The more I squirmed the tighter I was caught, or so it seemed. Finally, I figured enough was enough and this was almost too much. I kept on trying to shift my rear end to the right just enough to get the weight off of my left boot. I reckon old age and pure cussedness will finally pay off after a while. I thought I had scooted enough to help me free my left boot. But I was bunched up so tight that I couldn't lift my boot even helping with both hands. Then I pushed my left knee out to the left as far as I could and that popped the heel out of there. I pushed the right knee in the same direction and popped it free too. Next, I stretched my legs out and scooted forward. Finally stretched out on my back, I rolled over on my belly and began to crawl on out. I did go back and move that pile of boards and that made enough room to maneuver around where I could get my work done.
When I first realized I was trapped, I thought about having the little woman take the chain saw, cut a hole in the floor so I could just stand up, and step out. I could always repair the floor and that would be a lot easier too. But then I thought about her up there blindly cutting over and around my head with that big ole chain saw. Now those images were incentive aplenty for me to find another way out of that mess.
By
Roy Lovelace
